


Dearest Eban Handjob

by i_can_get_extra_with_my_fics



Series: The Not Multi Chapter Fic Shrine [24]
Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:08:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22914520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_can_get_extra_with_my_fics/pseuds/i_can_get_extra_with_my_fics
Summary: The konk man informs Connot about the truth about Eban
Relationships: Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy
Series: The Not Multi Chapter Fic Shrine [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1589902
Comments: 22
Kudos: 27





	Dearest Eban Handjob

**Author's Note:**

> I have no explanation for this

One day Eban Handjob and his boyf man Connot Murp were walking down the street with the fleshy extremities at the end of their arms intertwined. Then the konk man showed up.

"Hey fuckers! What's up?" said the konk man while dabbing.

Connot stood in front of Eban and T posed. "Not today konk man. Back the fuck away from Eban."

"I'm not heere for Eban. I'm heere for you Connot." The konk man said wiping away a tear as the dramatic anime music intensified. "Eban doesn't deserve you. He's a prick. He pretended to be friends with that dead kid that one time, manipulated the family who was grieving and started dating that one bitch who complained about the milk all the time."

Connot loses his stance and turned to Eban. "Eban, is all of that true?" The dramatic anime music turned intense as it intensified. Evan couldn't look Connot in the eyes. "Eban please tell me it isn't true."

Eban looked up at Connor as the anime music got sad but was still intensified. "I can not lie to you Connot. Those are all things I have done. I am not worthy of your love. I am sorry." Eban let go of Connot's hand and ran down the street while crying.

Connot looked at the konk man and thanked him for his service. Eban was never heard from again.


End file.
